In Parshas Vayeira we learn about Hashem’s plan to destroy the city of Sodom. The Torah relates that since the people of Sodom, Amora and the surrounding cities had become so wicked, Hashem decided He had no choice but to destroy all five cities. They were so wicked that to this day the wickedness of Sodom stands out as the paramount example of evil. The stories that the medresh relates about the acts of wickedness perpetrated in the city are horrific. Nevertheless, despite all this evil the Torah teaches us that Hashem revealed to Avraham that if there was a small number of tzaddikim left in the cities He would spare the entire population in their merit. However, as it turned out, even after Avraham’s prayer there weren’t ten righteous people on whom to rely and the cities were destroyed. But one has to wonder, what kind of tremendously righteous people would there have to be in order to redeem five entire cities of wicked people? How great of a person was Hashem looking for that would have enough merits that it would tip the scales back in Sodom’s favor?
Luckily we don’t have to wonder. There was one person who was saved from Sodom and the medrash teaches us that if there were 10 people like him Hashem would have saved all five cities. This person was Lot, who was Sarah Imainu’s brother, and until a few years before this incident had traveled with Avraham. So what was the great merit of Lot that would have saved the entire city? What we do know about Lot from the pasukim isn’t particularly flattering. We know he set out from Charan with Avraham, but then after the quarrel between the shepherds, he decided to detach from Avraham and settle in the evil city of Sodom.
Rashi quoting a medrash teaches us that the merit which saved Lot was earned while he was traveling with Avraham and Sarah to Egypt in the previous parsha. The Torah teaches in parshas Lech Lecha that when Avraham and Sarah were traveling to Mitzrayim to avoid a famine in Eretz Canaan, Avraham requested that those traveling with him tell the Egyptians that Sarah was his sister not his wife. If Pharaoh thought Avraham was Sarah’s husband, Pharaoh would have killed him in order to take Sarah. As one of the travelers in the group Lot went along with this story and “helped out” Avraham by not revealing Sarah’s true identity. It was this merit, Rashi teaches us, that elevated Lot to the level of a tzadik and allowed him to be saved and if joined with nine others, could have spared the entire city of Sodom, even with all its wickedness.
The Alter of Slabodka asks on this Rashi, that this hardly seems like a favor at all, and certainly does not seem like an act that would make someone into a tzadik. Avraham had made this request of those traveling with him in order to spare his own life-to betray him would be to condemn him to death. Furthermore it’s the least Lot could have done for Avraham as they were brothers in law and that it was because of Avraham that Lot had become tremendously wealthy. And on top of all that Lot didn’t even have to actually do anything; he just had to go along with the story that everyone was keeping to. For Lot to have revealed Sarah’s true identity would have been a treacherous act of cruelty towards his sister and brother in law. So how could it be that such an act could redeem the tremendous evil of Sodom and spare them from destruction?
The Alter explains that this is the power of acting in a way that accesses Hashem’s middas harachamim. To Hashem there is nothing more precious than seeing one person act kindly to someone else. It doesn’t matter what the circumstances or motivations are, or if there is even an action at all. Just the mere silence of a person in a situation where they could have spoken up and caused harm to someone else is enough to open a wellspring of compassion from Hashem that can wipe away the most powerful evil deeds. This is why Lot was saved from Sodom and was counted as a tzadik. When one holds himself back from speaking hurtful or damaging words he touches Hashem’s middas Harachamim, and once one activates Hashem’s middas Harachamim there’s no limit to the bracha He is willing to bestow.
How can we use this powerful idea in our everyday lives and enable ourselves to access the rachamim of Hashem? Most people wake up in the morning intent on having a successful and productive day. We have things we want to accomplish and goals we want to achieve. However, there are many things in this world that are beyond our control and can prevent us from reaching those goals. When things inevitably don’t go our way and we can’t get done what we set out to do it can be discouraging. It is possible to look back at a day or even a week or years and feel discouraged that where we thought we would be or what we had intended to accomplish hasn’t come to fruition.
What we can learn from this chazal is that there is always something that is within our ability to control and that can bring us tremendous success. The way we speak to and treat those around us has an impact. No matter our circumstances and what else is going on in our lives we always have the ability to treat other people with respect and kindness. In those dark hours when we are feeling particularly low, we still have the ability to keep our cool and not take things out on the people around us. When Lot was traveling down to Mitzrayim, he was probably not expecting to accomplish anything earth shattering. If anything he was probably frustrated at the prospect of having to travel again and fearful of what lay ahead in Egypt. But by the end of the day he had accomplished something so great that it was worthy of saving many thousands of lives. By holding back and keeping his mouth closed as they passed into Mitzrayim he evoked the mercy of Hashem and brought tremendous blessing into the world.
It is very hard to come to terms with this idea in this world that is so focused on physical accomplishment. But what we see from chazal is that we have this amazing power to make great accomplishments every day by “merely” guarding our tongue, speaking to people with respect and holding back when appropriate. When a child acts out for what seems like the hundredth time that day, when we have a juicy piece of gossip we want to share, or in any other of the countless interactions we have everyday. In that moment if we hold our tongue and don’t speak harshly we have achieved true success. Therefore there is never a day we can’t look back on without our ability to feel tremendously successful. It doesn’t matter how much money we made or lost, what plans did or did not work out. It doesn’t even matter what other sins we committed, as we know Lot was not a particularly pious person in other aspects of his life. Nevertheless, if at the end of the day we can say I spoke respectfully to others and didn’t take out my frustration on those around me, we have accomplished more than we can ever imagine and have brought Hashem’s Rachamim into the world.